Friday, March 16, 2007 @ 12:57 AM

i feel as if i'm gonna burst already that's why i'm here.

why in the fucking place i fell in love with someone like that ?? maybe not love but why did i get so involved ?? what i have for him is definitely not love, but just attachment. why did i help benny call you down to timezone in the first place ?? why did i take photos with you ??? why did i choose you instead of sQ. why !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

everytime i talked to you about things, you reply all the things that make me feel even worse. and the worst of all, i can see you smiling widely tomorrow and repeat the same thing. then you deny that i'm unimportant to you. what you show already contradict what you say. if you love a person, you will treat her like that ?? you will do things to put her under the scrutinisation of everyone ?? if you love her, you can't be strong for her ?? if you love her, you do nothing to make her feel proud of you ?? if you love her, you spare a thought for others before her ?? if you love her, THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU TRY DOING SOMETHING FOR HER !!!!

tell me ... WHEN !!!! WHEN HAVE YOU EVER DID SOMETHING FOR ME, WHEN DID YOU REALLY TRY TO CONTAIN MY LIMIT !!!

yes, you didn't tell people i screwed you but your face shows it all. and it makes nothing better. people who fucking dunno the story will just say "wa why you let her bully until like that, don't even dare show out."

after reading this, all of you may think "you so good meh say until like that."

i don't care what you all think cause the impression he created for me is enough to become a reputation. will someone who claims to love you, do this to you ?? who do i give up everything for you just to get this. am i really that not worthy for you to do a single shit thing for me ??

if YOU are reading this, you ask yourself la. whenever i act the bad guy in front of everyone to "protect" you, is it for your own good or for my own good ??

few things you always complain:

- physical uncomfort
- no money
- no mood
- unsatisfying surroundings
- detestful peers

you always say you sick or whatever. i ask you come out then you will complain this complain that, make me feel very bad. when others leh, " anything lor, i anything one." all of a sudden you complain 100times lesser. you spare a thought for other's feelings and not mine la !!! why ?? cause of face lor, you act so considerate to others.

complain tired can help people move house, play overnight mahjong, go countdown, go clubbing and whatever shit. i only asked you to remain online or maybe buy something for me, you complain like fuck. so doing something for others is easier and better than doing something for your love one ?? to show that you care ?? is that how you treasure?

no money play mahjong somemore, go clubbing, late night-outs, midnight cabs, choosy about jobs blah blah blah. pardon me for saying this. taking a beggar for example:

if you donate 10bucks to him, will he say "wa this note too old, i want new one."

you already say you are broke, still can be fussy over so many things. public toilets and food etc. for me, when i'm broke i just eat anything available. how about you ?? "za chai peng, sian la. this not nice that not nice, eat mac." imagine: if we were to get married and have kids. IF we are only left with 10bucks, you will still choose one lor. this type of thing you do, how you expect me to trust my happiness with you ?? when you show me that you can't even make proper decisions ??

you no mood, but i can't tell you, if i leave you with your friends w/o my pressence, it will be totally diff. FUCK !!!

you kou kou sheng sheng say this person cannot trust totally or be too close with. end up leh ?? this person come find you and you accept him totally. why do you always like to contradict yourself ?? so hard to even protect you. i'm playing the guy's role, and you the girl's, and yet you still like that KNN !!!

I SERIOUSLY DON'T KNOW WHY I DO SO MUCH FOR YOU EVEN THOUGH KNOWING THAT YOU DON'T LOVE ME AND DON'T APPRECIATE IT.

i may still love him alot, but can you show some thankfulness for all i've tried to do for you ?? instead of throwing it all away. you don't how it feels like to have no one loving you at all, that's why you are taking me for granted.

when you are reading this, you will just deny it. JUST ADMIT IT !!! damn you.

jarrel jason jarrel jason, when is all this shit gonna end !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love jason but i can only say it to myself. i don't love jarrel but why i do stupid things for him. KNN lao bei la !!! si jolynn. fark off from this world la !!! cut yourself cut until die la !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wo ba ai, jiao cuo gei ren le.

wo hao ai ni, jason. dao xian zai dou wu fa wang ji. i will say that i forget you already, but this sentence will never come true until i become senile or when i die.

jason .....................

it takes more than 18972389478395 miracles to bring you back to me. none has happened.

Friday, March 16, 2007 @ 12:57 AM

the significance

some people

VENT !!!!

Credits.